Tag Archive | "Rush Limbaugh"

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I want Rush Limbaugh to Live.

Posted on 31 December 2009 by Thraxxus

Apparently he is in the hospital – Something about chest pains – aka potential heart attack. I don’t want him to ever return to the radio, or any other public view for that matter, but hey, let the guy live. Maybe he will be proven wrong on everything – that will make me happy.

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Anal Poisoning = Great Band Name

Posted on 21 May 2009 by GlazednConfused

A great article on Rush’s favorite obsession. What else is there to say?

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In the Words of Mr. Big, I’m Addicted to that Rush

Posted on 03 July 2008 by GlazednConfused

I fully intended on writing an article on how I got kicked out of a Oakland Athletics game last week as a participant in a friend’s bachelor party. Let’s just say the stereotype of the fuck-up future brother-in-law (relentlessly propagated by sitcoms over the years) is 100% accurate. Furthermore, alcohol was involved – but I guess that goes without saying. The groom in question, major-league shnockered at the time, is one of the six readers of this blog and is a modest man. Also, non-violently getting ejected from a sporting event is actually not as exciting as you might think. I’ll leave it at that.

Instead, I will direct my attention to one of my favorite (and much more popular) fucksticks, Mr. Rush Limbaugh. Maybe you read about his kick-ass new contract for (ahem) $38 million a year for the next eight effing years. Also, we can’t overlook his claim of a 9-figure signing bonus. That’s >$100 million, in case you were rubbing your eyes in amazement at the first figure and missed the second. Let’s crunch the numbers, assuming no vacation:

More money than a small, starving third-world country in order to basically lie through his teeth part-time.

This is not unheard of money – Howard Stern is getting paid more overall, $400 million vs. $500 million, and that shallow hack doesn’t deserve it either. But at least he is “entertainment”, and is promoted as such. Oh wait he has a “controversial” position on free speech – he is pro. Way to go out on a limb, Howard. Next you’ll tell us you’re against nun-beatings. The bottom line is, you can’t take him seriously. He’s like the horniest clown ever. On the other hand, there are millions of gullible listeners that hang on Rush’s every word. When he says Michael J. Fox is faking his Parkinson’s Disease symptoms, they may laugh nervously but then wonder if it’s true. When he says Republicans should vote for Hillary to drag out the primaries, this isn’t just Howard Stern telling two lesbians to french kiss. This is a extremely influential political figure commanding his 14 million viewers to cornhole America. Here is more great Rush insight. The only influence Howard Stern has is the ability to maybe give someone a boner. If Limbaugh has that influence over you, then welcome to CrazyTown you sick twist. If you are a woman, then I applaud your pathetically low standards. Please email me with your contact info.

The recent trend is to point fingers at bloggers and their debatable “disregard for truth and ethics”, but at least they aren’t getting paid hundreds of millions of dollars to tell their readers that the NAACP should have “riot rehearsals”. Maybe a more important point should be raised regarding the media known as radio. If Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern are the cornerstones of the industry, that may be a primary reason for its slow demise.

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The obese and fatherless, point and laugh

Posted on 08 May 2008 by GlazednConfused

I visit one web site that could be classified as MSM – “Mainstream Media” to those unfamiliar with the dull acronym. CNN.com is my replacement for the local news – why should I care about the meth lab that blew up in Oakland, killing two squatters and their fourteen cats? Let’s face it, only people within 100 yards of the meth lab at the time of the explosion should really care. I work hard to get away from meth labs. However, that old lady next door that constantly and loudly berates her dog “Molly” is suspect.

So, as “liberal-biased” pablum for the masses, why is Rush Limbaugh on the main page? That’s right, the conservative icon was featured yesterday, shoveling some bullplop about how he wants a “weak Obama” to become the Democratic nominee. Previously, he was trying to get his listeners to basically sabotage the election process by having his listeners vote for Hilary, who he believed to be the weaker candidate to the Mighty John McCain. Blah blah blah.

Sure, it was just a link to the political blog section, but it was on the front page. Let me explain my position – that fat bastard should not be on the front page of any web site besides his own. Actually, he gives fat bastards a bad name – he couldn’t even get into a club of the lowliest fat bastards to walk the earth. They would tear up his application, laughing through tears. Looking at his site, he looks like he lost a little weight. Unfortunately for Rush, “Fat Bastard” is just a symbolic title. Rush is the guy that railed against broken families, yet has been married four times. He has mocked and derided drug abusers, yet is one himself. We run Larry Craig, anti-gay rights crusader, out of town on a rail for soliciting gay sex en el bano, yet uber-fat bastard Limbaugh is still influential enough to get on CNN’s front page.

The only statement I want to hear from Rush in the MSM is “Doctors have given me six months to live”.

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