Archive | Travel

Saw Fast and Furious 6

Posted on 19 June 2013 by ~baba

Thai Sexy 1
Michelle Rodrigues doesn’t do it for me anymore, she used to be the hot one I thought about when I was looking for a girl, after Jessica Alba that is. I think Thai girls have spoiled me for other women. The Victoria’s Secret models are pretty hot, Playmates are cute, Maxim girls are even hotter and still attract me but there’s a Thai issue of Maxim, it’s the one. I’m 65 now and living here in Thailand and every day I see 10s, 9s, and 8s. I’m a teacher at a vocational school and 90% of the students are women, in tight skirts, high heels, crisp white blouses, and I’m the only caucasian man on campus. I like it, but I don’t date students. The teachers are pretty good looking too. My immediate supervisor is at least a 9, and through out the school the women teachers are way above average. I like it. Since I’ve been here I’ve dated 17 to 45 year olds but mostly mid to late 20’s. I have had so much fun, I have a one year old Thai baby now and another on the way. The girls wanted them and the one year old girl is beautiful. I’m friends with the mama and can see her whenever I want. I have another on the way and don’t know if the same terms will apply there, I am friendly with her but she’s gotten married, probably see the baby sometimes but should keep the genealogy out of the conversation. I’ve settled down now with one girl, Janie and we’re getting along pretty well. I thought she was an awesome sex toy from the start but I’ve seen her cry at a movie, had dozens of good meals and she wants to get a job to help bring in income. A keeper I think. Anyway, if you’re an old, used up guy in America you should consider coming here. I’ll show you the time of your life, guaranteed and you might find that your life has just begun…….baba

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Chapter 3 Stranger than Fiction

Posted on 12 May 2013 by ~baba

Before dawn we had decided to hastily pack whatever we could easily get to into the SUV and go back into town and see if someone could help us find our missing team members. Just as the sun rose we began throwing stuff into the back of the vehicle, the girls climbed in the back seat and locked the doors, Benny and I got into the front and I started the SUV, or tried to, there was noting, no ‘r-r-r-r-r-r’, no nothing, no sound whatsoever other than the key sound in the key slot. I jumped out and opened the hood, auto mechanics has never been my long suit, I’ve depended on my charm to get me out of trouble till now. There was no clue what could be stopping the vehicle from starting, with some further testing we decided that the battery was totally dead. We all four tried to push the thing up the hill to the road but we couldn’t get it up, we even lost ground and would have lost it to the ravine if we had tried longer. We had to walk, it was a bright sunny day and we felt that if we all stayed together and made noise that we could safely get down the hill to the town before dark. We set off, machetes drawn and my gun in my hand. Within a few miles we were feeling better, walking two across, two deep down the vehicle ruts headed down hill. When we saw a clearing I ordered a stop to drink water and have a small snack.

Benny and I turned our backs as the girls relieved themselves and as Benny and I peed the girls were giggling and Sherry took a photo. Soon we were on our way again and the way became rocky, we were coming down off the plateau, we were relieved, Sherry said look, the road is getting better, I remember this, then she screamed. Jasmine was not with us anymore. We clustered together but there was nothing to be seen, rocks, some shrubs, no giant birds anywhere. We called out her name, not expecting to hear anything but trying anyway. I turned to Sherry and said when did you see her last? She started to say something and looking over my shoulder, screamed again, I turned to find Benny being held 6 feet above the ground by a huge, beaked, wingless bird, I started firing my gun before I knew what I was doing. The bird kind of walked in a half circle and dropped Benny and just fell over. I shot the bird twice more and went to Benny, he was obviously dead his neck was ripped open and his chest was crushed by the huge beaked creature.

I stood and looked at Sherry, we started running down the road, tiring quickly but afraid to stop, we came upon the scooter Tom had taken, turned over on the side of the road, there was no sign of Tom and we didn’t take time to look, we turned the scooter upright and it started immediately, we got on and shot down the road. One of the creatures came from nowhere and pulled Sherry off of the scooter and I gave it more gas, going so fast I knew I’d crash if I made one little mistake. Soon I made that mistake and the scooter threw me off, then rolled over me and stopped upside down a few yards past where I lay. I had the video camera and the tapes of what had happened to our expedition in a satchel over my shoulder and took it off, moving little as I had a lot wrong with me including a broken leg I think. I wasn’t going any further with these creatures hunting me so I tossed the satchel over to the overturned scooter, hoping it would be found by someone. I saw a shadow and raised my pistol and fired, or clicked, it was empty, I felt a crushing on my neck, then nothing………

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Stranger than Fiction Ch 2

Posted on 12 May 2013 by ~baba

As it turned out our attack victim was an overweight 40yr old, one armed man living with his elderly mother. He claims to have been picking hallucinogenic mushrooms in a clearing on the edge of the forest the year before. He had gone down into a ravine, crossed a large, rapidly flowing stream and come up the other side where he had spied quite a few of the mushrooms that he was seeking. He said that as he came over the edge of the ravine a huge bird had attacked him and that he had thrown up his arm to protect his face. He had felt something ‘hit’ his arm and was knocked backwards into the rapidly flowing stream and was carried quite a way down stream. He finally climbed out and discovered his right arm was missing, cut off almost cleanly at mid forearm. He said that he had run quite a while to get out of the area while holding his ‘stump’ to control the bleeding.

His arm was, indeed, cut off very cleanly at a slight angle, the bones could be seen through the skin and were both cut off at approximately the same angle. Jack, our ex-special forces team leader examined the arm and said that a cut like that would allow the muscles to draw up to the elbow joint and pretty much seal off the arteries and keep the person from bleeding too heavily. Seeing the severed arm and hearing his very animated and believable story we decided to proceed with caution, we equipped each member of the team with a very sharp machete with a belt sheath and instructed everyone to wear them at all times as the birds we were seeking could be more aggressive than the history books had led us to believe.

Jack and I even broke out our Beretta 9mm automatics that we had previously had worn only once before when we had been in an area with huge wild boars. We secured two four wheeled all terrain motorcycles and a beat up four wheel drive SUV and after packing all of the equipment, we started up the road to the high rain forest with Jack and I leading the way on the four wheeled scooters. After what seemed like twelve hours and many stops and conferences with the girls and consulting the GPSs, we arrived at what we determined to be the meadow with the ravine and rapidly flowing stream, the dark forest beyond gave me a chill as I looked for a place to put our base camp. I consulted with Tom and Benny and we decided to put the base camp on this side of the ravine and set up an observation post in the center of the meadow and have motion sensors and cameras on each of the four compass points as near to the forest as we could get them and still have them transmit. While Tom, Benny, and I set up the observation post Sherry was putting together something delicious, I hoped, to eat and Jack and Jasmine had gone off on one of the scooters to try to find some tracks, feathers, whatever, and maybe actually see one of the subjects of our search. Jasmine called us on the radio saying that Jack had stopped the scooter and walked over a hill and when he didn’t come back she went looking for him. There was no sign of him and she said she had been yelling his name for ten minutes.

Benny and I took the other scooter and went to investigate. Soon we found Jasmine, crying and wiping her eyes with dirty hands, I felt that something was very wrong, Jack wouldn’t have left for so long without radioing or calling out, some signal anyway. We tried to find some tracks but it was dry in this area and the ground didn’t show much of any of our tracks. There was a wooded area just up the hill aways and I pulled my gun and checked to see that it had a bullet in the chamber and that the safety was off and headed up the hill. It was much lighter in the wooded area there than in the forest below but there was nothing to see, no Jack, no footprints, nothing. We decided to go back to base camp and have a meeting. Sherry had food when we got back but no one was very hungry. We decided to leave Sherry at base camp and go search the area out to a half mile from where Jack had left and for us to stay in pairs at all times. We searched for nearly an hour and it was starting to get dark, there was no sign of Jack or of any of his equipment.

That night was sleepless, we all stayed up monitoring the infrared cameras, the heat detector and listening for anything from the sound monitors, there was nothing. We decided to look again in the morning and that if we couldn’t find Jack that we’d go tell the police, military, park rangers or whoever would handle a missing person in this part of the country. After nearly an hour of searching Tom and Jasmine called and told us to come to the other side of the wooded area, they had found a track, not Jack’s track, a very large bird footprint. When we all got there and had seen the nearly 20 inch long and nearly as wide track with deep gouges at the termination of each ‘toe’ of the footprint indicating huge claws. After photographing the print we decided to go back to camp and get the kit to make a plaster cast and send someone back to the small town to get some law enforcement agency involved.
Tom volunteered to take a scooter down the mountain to get some help while the rest of us got the plaster cast done. We returned to base camp and listened to the radio, waiting for Tom to let us know what he had found out. He never called, he didn’t answer when we radioed him either. It was getting dark and we huddled in the tent with the sensor equipment to spend another sleepless night.

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Stranger than Fiction

Posted on 12 May 2013 by ~baba

carnivSo after having our eye witness to the creature positively identify the object in the water by the shore as being the creature itself we approached cautiously in our boat, idling in towards the three dark objects. When were about a hundred yards away one of the objects raised it’s head and identified itself as a hippopotamus. Having our only eyewitness to the creature lose his credibility, we decided to pack up and leave Lake Bangweulu. Even though we hadn’t seen a creature that didn’t mean that there was no Mokele-mbembe anywhere in the 6000 square kilometers of Lake Bangweulu and Bangweulu Swamp, just that we hadn’t seen one. That’s it for our show today, tune in next week for another episode of Stranger than Fiction where we will head to the unexplored South Island of New Zealand wilderness in search of Upland Moa or Megalapteryx didinus, a twelve foot tall, 500 pound flightless bird thought to be extinct. However several recent sightings and a reported attack on a native in the area has led us to choose this to be our next quest.
Hi there, I’m Jerry Connors of Stranger than Fiction, a one hour show each week detailing our hunt for new and unusual creatures or those formerly thought to be extinct, and bring back photographic proof of their existence. My crew is led by Jack Stratton, a former Special Forces lieutenant with skills in tracking, setting up surveillance equipment, and dealing with the native populations we may run into during our searches. Next are Tall Tom Scott and his sidekick Benny Rosen who specialize in running the equipment we use to record our sightings, both in visible light and infrared, and last, but not least, Sherry Rutherford and Jasmine Casey, our computer and communications specialists.
So we packed up our equipment, left our studio in Los Angeles and flew to Christchurch International Airport on the East side of the South island of New Zealand. We soon found transportation across the island to a small village near the largely unexplored West coast high rain forest  a dark and wet and largely uninhabited area sometimes visited by hunters and herb collectors but by few other people as the area was considered ‘unlucky’ and indeed it had been for an unfortunate local man who had lost most of his right arm to a supposed Giant Moa attack. The Giant Moa has always been considered to be a gentle and awkward creature that was wiped out by being hunted by the early Polynesian settlers and later by the Maori. It is believed that cutting of the forests for agricultural purposes along with hunting them for food was the final straw for the Moa and they were thought to be extinct by the incursion of European settlers 300 years ago. Apparently due to information from many sightings in this area over the last several years, there may be a few specimens left and we hope to photograph one and hopefully bring some type of material back for DNA testing.
We located the man who reportedly had lost part of his right arm to a Moa attack, difficult to believe as the Moa has always been considered an herbivore, perhaps he had startled one or had approached a nest of eggs with a mother Moa guarding it. We began the interview:

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So, after a year of teaching…

Posted on 17 April 2013 by ~baba

LisaYes, I’m back. I taught senior English at a private school for eight months and have been out of work for two months now, not totally out of work, I’m teaching a private student and afternoons at a community college here in Nong Khai, Thailand. I’ve been here almost two years now, it’ll be two in May. It’s not bad living here, finances haven’t been that good except while I was teaching full time. Being 65 isn’t that bad here either, yeah, I have aches and pains, high blood pressure(under control) and I’m a little slower to get up after sitting or lying down. The people here don’t seem to have a problem with my age, in Hawaii, I was ok, but getting right down to it, it was hard to date anyone I was interested in. Sometimes I got lucky with a tourist girl, I’d ask, ‘Did you make any memories in Hawaii?’ and they’d say no, meaning they hadn’t had sex on the beach under the moonlight. I’d say, ‘Would you like to?’ and surprisingly enough I spent alot of time showing the island and sleeping with them. It was ok but I wanted a LTR or long term relationship. I had one but she was alcoholic and that’s a ride I can do without. Here in Thailand the girls see falang(derived from foreigner) as a source of income in one way or another. 500-1000baht for sex after paying a 2-300 baht ‘bar fine’ and it’s pretty nice, beautiful girls, experienced, what most of us need to keep tuned up. I’ve had quite a few non bar experiences, one leading to a 10 month old daughter, and another resulting in a 6th month pregnancy. Unfortunately I’m not with either of these girls but they have boyfriends and family taking care of them. I give them a thousand sometimes when I bump into them and it always surprises them. I have finally found a girl that I’ve been with for over a month(a new record for me here!) Her name is Lisa, short for Arisa and she really likes me. I met her in a bar, paid the bar fine and a thousand for all night and found that I’d found something pretty good. She’s from a village, Nong Song Hong, about 25 miles out of town and was recovering from a motor cycle accident two years before. She had spent a year in a wheelchair while her femurs healed and then got two hip replacements and re learned to walk, she’s still a little slow but we walk alot and I can see improvement. She also had head damage, something I’m familiar with as I’ve had my head split open before, hard to recover from. Anyway she has limited vision and needs to be taken care of since she can’t travel alone. She fits into my life like she was tailor made for me. All we need to do is to find her something to do during the days while I’m working(if I find work) and I think It’ll work out. Kinda ramblin’ here but the gist of it is I may settle down finally. We’ll see, and I hope to post here more often again, not a travel blog but a contentment blog. Thanks for staying with me…..~baba

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All quiet on the Eastern front.

Posted on 16 July 2012 by ~baba

I’ve been hired to teach school and am now on a week off while the Thai staff of the school administer the mid term test I put together. I teach M6 or the seniors, aged 17yrs. Overall it’s pretty fun teaching, within a month I had pretty much won them over and I can control the classes. Some teachers complain continually about noise and horseplay in the classes but I’m pretty much ok in that area. The classes, all eleven of them are way behind in English, most don’t speak it even though it’s their 6th year. I attempted to make up an easy midterm so at least half of the class would pass but the administration wouldn’t go for it. I ended up making up a moderately hard test and we spent the last two weeks preparing for it, I’m typing with my fingers crossed hoping that they can do well, at least pass….
On the personal front, a girl I dated for a short time who left me for someone else is back, I really like her and she has a 7yr old daughter named Ice Cream(really) and I think we’ll get back together. She’s staying with a friend and is working at a beauty parlor making 200 baht a day or about $6.50 US. Instead of offering to pay her that amount to stay with me I bought out a beauty parlor and giving it to her to make her own way, whatever happens I know I’ll feel good about it.
Working makes me appreciate the weekends, I was retired for a year and bored to death, or nearly. Now that I have a week off I’m reliving my retirement year and can’t wait to get back to work and long for the weekends…~baba

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Beer garden, sauces, and rejection

Posted on 05 April 2012 by ~baba

I’m not associated with Cat & Dave Bar anymore, the ex of the owner came back and was putting money into the bar and grumbling in Thai and giving me cold stares so I left it to him. I had nearly nothing invested, lived there two months and was fed well, had a pool table, tv, and big sound system. Not to mention the pretty girls. My former roommate asked me as soon as I left if I’d like to open a beer garden next to her restaurant, I thought about it and she pushed me to do it and I said ok. Today we bought about $70 worth of poles and grass thatches to make a large structure, cement, sand, and gravel were delivered, I went to the nearest megastore and got glasses, ice buckets, and tongs. Beer is drunk here with ice cubes in it, I’m used to it and actually like it better than having the last 1/4 be warm. Tomorrow two workmen are coming to help us put it together, hope it works, I spent alot this month and it’s just day two of my fiscal month(SS deposited to my account on the 4th)
I had a 19yr old college girl had a crush on me and we were going to get together after she returned from Bangkok but she found a guy there and is going to stay/move there. So I went out last night lookin’ for love. I’ve mentioned my ex roommate Som, the Lao girl who took care of me while I was scrambled from my mugging, turns out though she’s less than 100 pounds, everyone is afraid of her. Of the three girls I flirted with last night only one was willing to come home with me and she started talking about her parents in Lao, her little boy needed a school uniform, etc, I finished my beer and came home alone. I don’t know what I’m going to do, there are several girls available to me that I’m not really attracted to but I want someone so hot that I can’t live without her, it’s worked for me in the past, got a lot of fine ex’s. Oh, sauces… I had some roast chicken two days ago, same as all the rest but the sauce which is usually sweet chili-garlic sauce had tamarind in it, really good. Every once and awhile someone has a good idea and they usually get my business, all the food is good here, even the unidentifiable intestine dishes. Tonight I had the back 1/2 of a large talapia with steamed veggies and rice and a sauce that was way too hot for me but was delicious. It tasted like chilis but it was savory and a little salty and I couldn’t not eat it. I usually get a 9 baht icecream cone when I’m suffering Thai mouth but I savored the pain on this one, hope it doesn’t backfire on me tomorrow….baba (photo is of Som, she’s not too mean, she only hit and kicked me about 40 times)

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And then I got the Viagra dealership

Posted on 16 February 2012 by ~baba

What a long, strange trip it’s been. Moved here to Thailand never having been here before and almost no money, overdrafted my account immediately and was broke for three weeks, moved across the country and was almost immediately mugged and hospitalized for almost two weeks.. It’s gotten stranger and stranger. I was given half ownership in a bar for a minor good deed I did and through the bar have met two Thai men who are going to get me long term visas here and through a friend I met here I may get a pharmacy license and set up a Viagra, etc sales booth at the bar. This is the land of older men and younger women and I believe this legal outlet will be a financial success for me and an influx of business for the bar. In other news… I’m going to Pattya in the Gulf of Thailand to meet the pharmacy owner and get the license and going thru Bangkok on the way down and back. Coincidently, yesterday I met and took out a pretty little shop girl to see Underworld Blood and Guts Sequel in a frigid theater and we got close pretty quickly. She has family in Bangkok and is going there today and has invited me to stay with her and her family while I’m there. If you are thinking of moving here, do it, she said she was 22, I said I was 64, she said no problem, lets be a couple. Need any other encouragement guys? Sooooooo, I have a ride down to Pattya and he’s picking up the tab and a free place to stay, so far so good………~baba

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Hospital again(this makes six)

Posted on 20 November 2011 by ~baba

Last night my chronic back pain flared up, I happened to have a massage therapist handy but it turned out not to be muscle soreness, it was a flare up of my colitis. I’ve been diagnosed and treated once with an antibiotic, then rediagnosed as chronic back pain though I’ve always known it was colitis. This morning it wasn’t any better and I went to the hospital emergency room(cheaper than a doctor here) After an examination and various tests and check ups I was told it was indeed colitis and I also had high blood pressure and early signs of kidney problems. I guess the old body needs some supplementation. I was given a list of 11 prescriptions and told not to eat hot or salty foods, all they have here most places. I’ve decided to fill the antibiotic and the steroid and see if they work to aleviate the pain, I don’t have too many of the other symptoms, some are pretty bad so I guess I’m lucky. Colitis is now thought to be an autoimmune disease and runs in families. I’ve never heard of anyone related to me who has had it but I have an email to my brother discussing family health. The doctor I had spoke English very well and I complemented him on it, most health professionals here have limited if any English skills(and I’ve spent 13 days in hospitals here) Not much about Thailand here but just to make even I’m not going to post a photo of my colon……………baba

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Posted on 16 November 2011 by ~baba

I’ve done some of the tourist stuff, rode an elephant, seen Khosan Road area, seen cobras, one in my room, done most things a tourist would do here in Thailand(even taken a couple of bar girls home). But yesterday was better than all of that. Koy, my landlady, and I went to pick up her children from school. I had to wait outside as the kids came out of the various grade classes, one shyly came over and offered his hand and I shook it, immediately about 50 boys of different ages came over and shook my hand, some introducing themselves, some asking questions, it was nice to see them. In the Thai schools that I’ve seen the children are in uniforms and are very well behaved, even off of the school grounds. After we got the girls, who were very proud to have their ‘falang’ ‘papa’ come pick them up, we went to the country where an uncle of Koy’s had cut about 20 saplings to build an addition to her restaurant(minimal structure, best food I’ve had in Thailand) We Then went to the market. Koy told me to take the kids and get out of her way, she was going to shop! Wew, Wei, and I went and got crepes with various sweets, orange slushies and the cost for two of each was about a dollar. By this time Koy had finished shopping and we went to her restaurant. The her father and I unloaded the saplings and the women folk built a fire to light the charcoal and proceeded to cook. Soon it was ready and instead of eating on the restaurant tables, mats were spread and the feast was laid out in the center and a plate of rice for each person. There was about a two pound fish, fresh salad greens, side dishes of all types and it was all good. I realized that few foreigners had the opportunity to see the ‘real Thailand’ by just vacationing and I was lucky to become part of a family and see the country’s every day life. I love these people, not just my family, I love the guys who work hard all day for less than $10, the toothless old ladies who wave at me as I bike by, the rice farmers, harvesting now, drying rice everywhere on blue tarps… Some places one lane of the highway is for rice drying. These are hard working and beautiful people. Can you tell I’m impressed?…..baba

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Posted on 10 November 2011 by ~baba

Or something like that, last night Mama,  Papa, Wei, and Wew (my family) got into the family pick up truck and Koy, my girlfriend said  ‘Go’  so I went with them. We went over dark bumpy roads, winding thru rice paddies and finally arrived at a row of candles on posts and a candle lit ‘dock’ with children and an adult placing floating flower incense offerings. The lit up centerpiece was a Naga, thought to be mythical until 1972 when the US Military, during the kill everyone in Asia war, happened onto a 37′ specimen in the Mekong River. The Naga was lit up by candle light and the occasional firework burst. Everyone seemed pleased to have a falang participating in the festivities and there was a crate of local rum. A truck pulled up playing Thai music at earsplitting volume and the cigarette smoke and fireworks smoke was heavy. Wei and Wew set their offerings afloat and Wei the older one turned to me and recited a practiced speech to me, ‘Papa Dave, you make me angry.’ I think she may not have meant that, she was smiling broadly so I’ll wait to discuss it later. The kids were coughing as well as Papa Dave so we left and came home. It was a wonderful event, Pooamka is as close as I could get to an explanation, I can’t wait to do it again, whatever it was………..baba

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Sometimes good stuff happens…

Posted on 09 November 2011 by ~baba

At the urging of my roommate, Som, I left my comfortable, cheap, beautiful, furnished apartment in a familiar area with friends and acquaintences everywhere and moved across town to a place I’d never seen that wasn’t furnished and we had to buy all our appliances, curtians, everything. IT’S WONDERFUL! The neighbors(it’s a duplex) are a gramma, grampa, cute mommy and her two adopted girls. Every meal they come over and get me and make me eat with them, it’s good food and they’re genuinely glad to have me. The kids have asked me if they can call me papa and I’ve said yes, I’m babysitting them now while their mom is going shopping, preparing to send them to school. A few days ago I went to school with them, they were so happy, they’d never had a daddy take them to school and they were so proud, I felt awesome. Just now they turned off the computer(blinkinblogs saved what I had written, YEA!), told me to stand up, walked me outside and we got on my bike, I took one a few blocks down the street to the family restaurant and brought the other back, we’re communicating pretty well with minimal words and gestures. The mom can speak a little and we spend some evenings practicing English. Monday or Tuesday I go to Lao for my visa, I hope they’re lax at this time, sometimes they give you a final 15 days stamp and yer outa here! I have court papers and hospital bills and a pleasant demeanor so I feel good about my chances. I have some recent photos of Mommy, Wei, Wew(the kids) and of Som………baba

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Posted on 01 November 2011 by ~baba

What did you do for Halloween? I watched a zombie fest on a movie chanel out of Macau but couldn’t stay up to finish it inspite of drinking coffee all evening. I still haven’t moved, haven’t even seen the place yet. I may let Som move there and I’ll move over a little at a time over this next month. The scooter deal is going slowly, he hasn’t printed the contract because his printer is out of ink, meanwhile I have no transportation to the new place, a tuk tuk ride would be over 100 baht each way and would come to $200 a month which I can’t afford. The scooter would be $66 plus gas and oil. I have to go to Vientiene for a visa again, it’s been over three months since I got the two month double entry visa, two two month visas in one. Each of the two could have been extended by a month but it’s 1900 baht each time and getting another 2+2 visa is only 2000 baht in Lao and I like Vientiene, for a major city it’s pretty easy going and relaxed. Last time I spent the night there the beautiful desk clerk asked me to marry her and she was serious. The city is alongside the Mekong River and has a cafe/restaurant district there like Paris. Laos was a French colony and has fantistic breads, bakeries, cheeses, wines, and BeerLao which is a delicious hoppy beer that is only $1 for a 22oz bottle. Anyway I have to get another visa by the 18th and I think I’ll go as soon as I get my SS check so I’ll have the money, last time I was late getting my visa it cost me 1500 baht for the three days. A friend of mine is so far over due now that he can’t pay the fine so he’s basicaly hiding till he gets caught or sneaks into another country. The police and immigration are serious here, I wish him luck……….baba

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When life gives you lemons…

Posted on 29 October 2011 by ~baba

I had a friend drinkin’ n drivin’ in his convertible, cruising through Arizona one night. He passed a large truck and waved his bottle at the driver and after several waves of the bottle the driver pulled over and had a couple of shots. He offered John some lemons which was his load and John accepted. The driver swung a chute over John’s car and nearly filled it with lemons, John was in the convertible when they were dumped and not being able to move he slept it off there. The next day he was able to redistribute the load so he could drive and stopped at the first supermarket and traded lemons for bags and a box to make a sigh and sold lemons. Well he has some wild tales and some that are unbelieviable but there’s one thing I know to be true for sure, he’s a Cajun and one of his reciepies uses 1 tep of kerosene, and it’s delicious……..baba(this is an actual photo of him, I lived at his house once when I needed a place and he lived at my place when he needed to one winter, and yes, I’m feeling pretty good finally)

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Grand Opening(of my head)and two letters

Posted on 25 October 2011 by ~baba

What is the name of the village that you are moving to? What is the nearest big city? How long have you known Som?
It looks like your scar is healing up okay. I’m glad that the new medicine that you are taking is working well. Let’s hope it continues.
It’s looking like the sale of the 4 lots will probably go through at a sales price of $20,000. Cross your fingers. We will have to finance it, though. I am not sure what the down payment will be yet. I’ll let you know as soon as I know.
I’m glad that you are feeling better and that you are excited about moving in with Som. Be kind to her and always treat her with respect.
Love, Bruce

Reply: I don’t know the village name, it’s 6km towards Udon Tani from Nong Khai where I’ve been living, we’ll shop in Nong Khai for city stuff and in the village open markets for food, etc. Som was the first person I met in Nong Khai other than the school I taught at briefly. She is 22, from Laos, has parents and three young brothers living there and is returning from a visit tomorrow. She heard that I liked her and moved into my apartment when I was in the hospital the first time and has been caring for me since then. She brought up the idea of marriage and we were thinking of moving to Laos and living near her family but she’s gotten the idea of opening a beauty parlor here in Thailand and her bringing in some income which I like since I’m not quite making it here with the hospital payments, or even before that….
As far as treating Som kind and with respect, there is no question, first I really care for her and second, she grew up hard in two poor countries and had to make her own living, she’s tough and won’t put up with any disrespect, She wears the pants in the relationship, we do what she wants usually.
Last week we went to a sculpture park with 100’s of Buddah and related statues and we ran into a vendor who asked how the French girl was that I had been there with before and Som was upset that I’d been there with some other girl. I gave her a kiss and said that I’d never kissed anyone there before. She turned away but I saw she was smiling and so was everyone else watching us. I hope it works out, I’m pretty happy.
My vertigo is good today, I have brain damage for sure and have been controlling the vertigo with medication and various positioning techniques but sometimes I have episodes where I lose the ability to speak and use my hands, they’re short and scarey but they go away soon. The longest was 1-2 hours and the shortest was minutes. Not being able to speak is pretty weird, I can’t think of the word much less speak it. The hospital ran every diagnostic test they could, ekg, x-ray, blood sugar, you name it. They advised me not to hurt my head again, after all I did have a sword enter my brain and there is damage of some type up there. I guess overall I’m on the plus side, happy and only slightly debilitated.
Hope the land sale goes through and I really appreciate all the work you’ve done to get it going and thanks for what all you have done for me since Mom’s passing………..Dave&Som

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Will you still love me when I’m sixty-four?

Posted on 09 October 2011 by ~baba

Monday the 10th I’ll be 64 and my cute li’l Lao roommate is throwing me a party at SEXY BAR next to our apartment(you’re all invited) In other news the two sword wielding muggers have been caught, confessed, reinacted the crime for the police and were on several news broadcasts two days ago. My broken watch and still usable cell phone were also recovered. I don’t know what will happen to them but everyone says several years in jail for sure. I can go after their assets if I want and they both have motorbikes, one very nice and I’d like to give my girlfriend one, she’s 22 and very beautiful and I’d prefer her on a motorbike on a main road at night rather than on my bike taking shortcuts down alleys. I’ve heard there are muggers here. I’m on my feet now, riding my bike when Som isn’t using it and I walk alot now. I’m still having vertigo but am very careful about being next to something I can hold on to. There’s a proceedure that causes your inner ear balance crystals(calcium of some type) to migrate to their original position and I’ll be trying that when I find the info. I have a 300# neighbor who will assist me with the proceedure, under the direction of Som I’m sure. I am a lucky guy, I have friends, a nice apartment, the prettiest girl in town for a roommate, and am regaining my health daily…….baba

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Cutting corners

Posted on 26 September 2011 by ~baba

I have made arrangements with the local hospital, my residence for half of the month, to pay $100 a month until my bill is paid off, I can do without coffee I guess, about $35 a month. 35 baht a day is $35 a month, only eat one meal out each day, $30, and stop using the internet, about $30 a month. I’ll find some other thing I can live without too. I’ll miss you all but maybe I can use someone’s laptop sometime and see how you are doing. Bye……..baba

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Other than the obvious, more good things about Tha(and Lao) girls

Posted on 20 September 2011 by ~baba

I was released early from the hospital because of no funds to pay my bill, within an hour I had passed out, fallen, hit my head on the floor and went in for more xrays and three days more hospital, crap! Well, when I was in the first time for the first two days I lay on a gurney/bed with no sheet, the bloody pajamas I wore since I was admitted, had to beg to have my catheter bag emptied, no pain meds or food or water. I felt pretty neglected, I was pretty neglected. Late that day some of the girls from a local bar came in to see me, adopted me and washed, changed me, brought me whatever I needed. they came in twice a day from then on to bathe and change me and it was a gift from God/Buddah. When I checked out the second time a friend had moved into my place and had set the place up for me so I could stay in bed and not walk around and since she couldn’t be there all the time she got a friend to move in with me. I’m doing better now, have an appetite and just now walked all the way to the internet place, about 1 kilometer! This is a major thing! I have my appetite back, I lost over 7 kilos in the last two weeks but feel sorta ok now, I still get dizzy but the vertigo only lasts a moment now. I had vertigo for over two days once, horrible, I kept my eyes closed and refused to move the whole time. The good news is that I’m ok, I have two girls who care for me and we’re family now. When I was in the hospital several falang(Ameroeuropeans) visited me for a few minutes then left and never returned, the Thai/Lao people who visited brought food, cared for me, sat with me while I slept… I can’t leave here, I love these people…..baba

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Mama’s Day

Posted on 11 August 2011 by ~baba

Here in Thailand it’s the Queen’s birthday, no liquor sales, no bars open, probably a parade, they’re big on parades here and go all out. The bar next door to my apartment is getting three brand new girls today and can’t open, getting a new pool table too. The Mama san has offered me my choice of the new girls and I think this time I’ll take her up on it. I’ve been offered a girl before but it was a choice of a new girl who wasn’t dealing well with fat, old, drunk, farang(foreigners) or a veteran, 30’s bargirl. I hemmed and hawed and said how about tomorrow, and never quite made a commitment. I think I gotta take this offer or I may never get another and who knows, it may be the event of a lifetime. I have not heard from my Lao friend who may or may not move in with me, she should be here by now, I’m sure she will show up when I have this other girl in my bed… In other news I love my apartment, it’s the equivalent of an American efficiency apartment with no kitchen but brand new and costs $130 a month plus elect/water and has 5-6 English cable tv channels. My brother has sold a small piece of land in New Mexico and I’ll have a teeny monthly income from that and hopefully more will sell and I’ll be able to live comfortably here rather than nickle dime finance which so far has been the case. Bye for now, details on request…….baba

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Fon called, then Tham, but I want Som

Posted on 01 August 2011 by ~baba

I have had a little communication problem here, not too bad though. I asked a man where the mall was and he talked a moment with a woman nearby who informed me that the man didn’t date other men….. When I moved from my last apartment I told the desk girl I needed my deposit back by 5:00 on the 9th. On the 9th at exactly 5:00 a man came to pick up my laundry.
I was at a bar having a well deserved beer after a hard day of exploring the town by bicycle and a girl playing pool pointed her stick at me and started wiggling her hips, I waved her over and said let’s kiss and get the ball rolling. She was fun, rowdy, was the one who called when my phone broke, and was so jealous I couldn’t talk to any other woman without a scene. I started ducking her, not answering her calls but it’s a small town. After two weeks of no contact I started dating her friend Fon, a petit, quiet personality untill she started calling me her boyfriend. The show began, sexy dancing, attacks of kissing, groping(this is her, not me) and I’m a little embarassed to go out with her. I had a crush on a girl, Som, a 20yr old, who was a bartender at one of the local ‘garage’ bars, the garage door opens and they’re open for business, alot of fun really, inexpensive, if you stop by at meal time you eat, etc. She was from Lao and is the sister of a girl one of my coworkers. Suddenly she was gone back to Lao to live with the family there. I told her friend that I missed her and wished she hadn’t left, the friend said call her and ask her to come live with you. Pretty simple here, I called and she’s coming to live with me in 7-8 days, either that or will be here to pick up my laundry…baba

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Swimming down Mee Chai Street

Posted on 30 July 2011 by ~baba

Rain Rain Rain… last few days whole trees have been floating down the Mekong along with dead animals and one body, massive flooding upstream. Last night it started raining, hard, very hard, trash bags were floating down the street and on my way home my bicycle got too deep to move forward anymore and I found myself swimming down the street, it was fun except for all the litter in the water. When I finally made it home half my room was wet, small leak in the roof above my space. The landlord had put several buckets and a sheet or something on the floor. I dried off as much as I could and got into bed, no fan that night, I was in a fetal position under the covers, a first for the Thailand experience. The room I’m in is a temporary one, on credit. My room at Mut Mee where I had been staying reached some credit limit even though I had an agreement to pay on the 4th when my SS was deposited. They renegged and kicked me out, keepin my passport. The place has a reputation for underhandedness and it’s deserved, I had little money and no place to stay. Fortunately the room I’m came about in conversation. The 4th I’m getting a NICE apartment with fridge, tv, HOT WATER!!!!, towels, sheets, all the stuff I don’t have. A fan is a little extra. I have alot of friends here, get invites for lunch, coffee all the time and try to bring some veggies, creamer, whatever to show my gratitude. The teaching job is over for now, they have fifteen volunteers scheduled to teach and only nine classes so three of us ‘residents’ are laid off for now, it’s actually a relief, teaching is easy but class prep work, lesson planning, copying, paperwork, is sorta like work.
My camera phone broke, my rowdy ex girlfriend called and when I opened it it came apart. I found another one for 680 baht, about $23US and am using that now, unfortunately there is no camera on the new phone so any photos will be older or borrowed with permission from owner from the internet. I’ll post again around the 4th when I can afford to get on a computer again…….baba

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Posted on 23 July 2011 by ~baba

I’ve been busy, teaching a class at a public school, three classes at Isira, the free school and I have one private student now. Over the past few days I’ve been in Vientiene, Lao(Laos) getting my 6 month visa. We went by bus to the Thai Immigration checkpoint and did the appropriate paperwork to leave the country, then the same bus(they wait for everyone to finish)across the Mekong River bridge into Lao to the Lao Immigration, paid $35 for a visa and went into Vientiene to the Thia Embassy and took a number, I was #83 and an hour later I processed through, two photos, three copies of this and that, two pages of forms filled out and was told to come back after 1pm the next day….

Vientiene is a huge city that is slow paced like a small town. You can cross most streets safely and the largest ones if you’re careful, even where there are no crosswalks. The people are friendly there, in Thailand many of the people have been exposed to rowdy, rude, abusive foreigners and are hesitant to even look at you. In Lao they are friendly, approach you and ask where you’re from and are eager to show their English skills, I found myself correcting them and encouraging them to keep practicing. The women are incredibly beautiful and very sweet. If Thailand ends up to not be the place for me I will surely move to Lao next. I’ve heard that Viet Nam is even better, it’s no wonder that there are so many men my age over here living the life they’ve always wanted.

Well, I got my visa the next day with virtually no waiting and we decided to stay another night, I was with a shopaholic and she wanted to go to the markets. Everything under the sun! Rhinocerous horns to iphones, wow, lots of rhino horns from baby ones skinned off to huge ones still attached to the sawed off snout bones, horrible to think of the deaths of these unique animals for a truly useless product thought to give virility to older men. I had fun watching the shopping, I bought an English workbook for my private student and a back scratcher, and some excellent Lao coffee. The coffee crop in Lao is bought up by the French coffee companies immediately but some is saved for the nicest coffee houses, it’s awesome, I had two iced lattes that were indescribably good. Lao Coffee, the popular brand there is an import from South America.
I’m back in Thailand now, went to a friend’s birthday last night, a huge feast and 60 cent beer, went home early and caught up on my sleep. I’m starting to feel very comfortable here, dozens of friends both farang(foreigners), Thai and Lao. It feels good……..baba

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Teacher Dave

Posted on 13 July 2011 by ~baba

Isarn, I believe is the name of the group that funds the school I checked out yesterday. They teach Thai children and young adults the English language, I applied. Last night I assisted two classes and observed a third, it’s awesome! The younger children were less interested and it was a zoo but the 10ish and older were very interested and competitive. One class last night was geography, continents and countries. The teacher asked me where I was from and I said Hawaii. He asked the class to look up Hawaii and find out what country it was in and what continent it was on. It was fun.

Working there as a volunteer will give me credentials to look for paying jobs and the deeper into the backwoods here the higher the pay. I prefer the rural areas anyway, I don’t drink other than a beer or two a month and I’m in bed by 9pm, I don’t need no city!!! I’m also house hunting, one of the other volunteers knows of a house for 3000 baht, probably empty of furniture but I’ve slept on a floor before and having a house would be nice, get some roommates, share the rent and live for 30-40 US a month, it may work out…..baba(the little dealie doesn’t work on this computer, sorry)

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Nothing COOL to say…

Posted on 12 July 2011 by ~baba

I’m in Nang Khai two days now, yesterday I went to Lao, Vientiene and got my visa on time, no cost!!!! Well, $35 to get into Lao(Laos) but that’s a 30 day visa and I’ll only need to get one every third time I go if I watch the calendar closely. While in Vientiene I went to a pharmacy, almost everything is legal over the counter there and got my antimalaria med and prednisone for my left knee, recent surgery, and the cost for 60 of each was 180 baht, about $6. Not bad.

Coming back there was a drug search and I thought what if these aren’t legal in Thailand, I had a prescription bottle for one though and swung my bag up towards the search table. The guy waved me past…

I went to a hostel called Mut Mee, 150 baht a night and very nice, the room is basic and small but the place has many thached roof huts with tables, electricity, fans, chairs with cushions, wifi, etc, upscale for the area and price.

There are dozens of tourists and locals hanging out there and I’ve met several and hang out with them too, went to a sculpture park recently with a pretty French girl and had alot of fun, what a sweetie. We rode bikes, she’s about 5′ 10″ and was wearing shorts and gave over a hundred guys whiplash as she cycled by. The sculpture park was awesome, 16yrs of work by a wealthy artist who went on to do two more parks in Lao. Gotta go now, can’t be squandering all my SS check on the internet, keep the comments rolling in, next to my daily Dilbert comic strip they’re my favorite diversion……..~baba

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Posted on 08 July 2011 by ~baba

I’ve mentioned massage in passing here but I never had one this good… I’m getting ahead of myself here. As you know if you read here often I had a bad case of impecuniosity which has been alleviated by my debit card being activated recently. I felt I owed many of the people here in Chaing Mai something for helping me when I was down. I took friends to eat at the restaurants that had helped me, flipped off the bookseller who wouldn’t give me credit(ok, kidding on that one), and got a massage from Phung the massage girl who had given me fruit and crackers during my ordeal. I’ve had massages, great massages where I was dizzy when I was done, where I blissed out and woke up alone. I had a ‘tourist massage’ in Bangkok, pay, lie down, get worked over for an hour, leave while the next customer is getting ready.

On my first trip thru Chaing Mai I got an oil massage, unlike the regular clothed Thai massage, I undressed and was oiled up, it was good and I needed it after having ridden the bus from Bangkok all night but it seemed pretty sexual, alot of the strokes ended up near my genital area. After the massage I talked with the massage girl, Katya and we exchanged phone numbers. She called twice wanting me to come get massage and being out of town once and on my penniless era the second time I said no thanks. The third time she called she said ‘Ok, if I come over will you give me a massage?’ Wow, I finally got it, sometimes I’m a little dense, someone wanted to go out with me. We had alot of fun, drank alot of beer and she’s the only girl I’ve dated here in the last month, but I’m talking about massage, and Phung is the Master, or rather mistress. First she dressed me in loose Thai pants and I left on my tshirt, and she started to work on me, pain, pleasure, once I came to consciousness and thought I was on my own bed for a moment. An hour and a half of serious bodywork, I gave her 300 baht, a bargain for me and her….~baba

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