In order of shock value:

1. A few years ago, Abba was offered $1 billion to regroup and tour. Mamma Mia!
2. Those sharp tips at the end of whipped cream cans? A lip wound takes weeks to heal, believe me. Holy water-seared undead recover faster. Be patient…the airy sweetness will be dispensed in a timely manner.
3. Kinko’s as a brand is no longer.

That last one is really not all that surprising. Kinko’s apparently has sentimental value with college kids, who met socially late at night when they were cramming to finish papers. Myself, I had a computer with some sort of printer for the last 20 years. Before that, I would cheap out and go to the library to make copies. Now, everyone has a color printer. R.I.P.

I had not visited a Kinko’s in probably 10 years until a month ago, when I had to mail a FedEx package. I walk in and I literally have little clue what to do. The place was cluttered, with no real pointers on where to go to do anything. I just stood there like a schmuck until an employee, admittedly friendly as hell, saw my package and had mercy upon me. A mixed experience, to be sure.